As a SelfDesign Mom of two girls, ages 6 and 2, I am a keen observer of their development. I have observed that, while their bodies may be small, their imaginations, zest for life, and capacity for self-love is amazing!
I would like to challenge our current cultural meme that informs us our children are “less than” because they are small. I meet so many parents who are trying to raise their children in a conscious and respectful manner, yet are struggling to break free of societal notions of children that are based upon prejudice and fear.
In the past 6 years, I have learned to view my children as amazing mentors while I reclaim my passion for life and learn to love myself just as I am. My daughters are my little zen masters.
Young children may not have the functional capabilities of adults, yet in many ways, they are closer to the state of happiness, peace, and contentment that adults are seeking. I watch my daughters as they dance through life, confident that they are loved and supported, free to explore this fascinating world. They are not plagued with self-doubt and negative judgments of themselves and the world.
They are moving forward as if everything is possible. Failure is ok. They have stumbled and tripped while learning to walk and don’t beat themselves up for failures. They pick themselves up and keep going. They are natural learning beings.
How many adults do I know who dance through life with a smile on their face and a bright light beaming from their eyes? Not enough! Most adults I know are plagued by inner demons that block their enjoyment of life. This widespread hunger for self-love and acceptance has created a $10 billion self-help market.
My husband told me this morning that he got excited about SelfDesign when he realized that the way he was raised and educated led to years of suffering. He sees SelfDesign as a way to raise and educate our children in a loving, respectful, empowering way. Few of us are encouraged to develop awareness of our self and our learning process from birth. It is the rare genius who is given the permission and space to explore natural gifts. Too often, we are forced to fit into a system that may not work for us at all.
In “SelfDesign: Nurturing Genius Through Natural Learning”, Brent Cameron and River Meyer write:
…happiness comes to us naturally. We associate happiness with well-being, love, and balance. It is our fundamental condition and our indicator of essential fulfillment. Unhappiness arises when someone or something moves us out of this balance, which happens most often in relationship with others. Some relationships support and sustain our happiness while others limit us and reduce our freedom. A feeling of unhappiness, like the feeling of hunger, gives us the clue that something is missing and that a change needs to occur. In the politics of relationship, when our rights are diminished we feel frustrated and controlled. We succumb to apathy, or we fight for change.
As you reflect upon your life (and your child’s), ask yourself which relationships and situations support happiness and which limit happiness? Do you or your children ever feel like your rights are being diminished? Do your work relationships support or limit happiness? If your child attends school – does this school support or limit happiness? Does school recognize your children’s natural right to choose what they think about?
It is a destructive myth in our society that we need to be unhappy to make money or learn something. In fact the opposite is true. As Humberto Maturana, evolutionary biologist says:
Learning is a transformation in living together. We tend to think of learning in terms of acquisition of information–this is not what it is. It is a transformation in living together, a transformation of doings in a process of doing things together with others.
Only love expands intelligence, because love as the domain of those behaviors through which the other arises as a legitimate other in coexistence with oneself, opens us to see and to enter in collaboration.
I delight in watching my children dance through life with their eyes sparkling and a big smile on their faces.
Caprice Pitcher
SelfDesign mom and Director of Strategic Planning
I really accept the ideas which is said below the toopic Nurturing Genius Through Natural Learning. Its very nicereading your blog.
Hi Debbie,
Did you change your name? Caprice is beautiful and your picture is gorgeous.
What is your learning process. Is this a form of homeschooling? Or do they meet daily?